HUCKSTER GOES THEOLOGICAL

 

The Odious Orange Huckster
Has moved beyond plain ol’ autocracy
To a murky authoritarian theology
Where he is the authoritarian
And your salvation depends
On a Christian nationalist ideology
 
That gibberish make any sense?
Well, maybe not
But normal political issues are taking
A back seat to the fabrication and incoherence
The Huckster brings to the political arena
As he struggles for self-assurance

SHADOW GOVERNMENT

 

The Orange Huckster is putting together
A shadow government
So he can hit the ground running
When the voters renew his covenant
 
One already working member
Is a fella named Grenell
He’s traveling the world
As the Huckster’s envoy
To the autocratic carrousel

HUCKSTER SICS FOLLOWERS ON JUDICIARY

 

A federal judge has rebuked
The Odious Orange Huckster
In effect calling his diatribes
Against judges and their families
Dangerous bluster
 
The Huckster is definitely well beyond
The boundaries of civic discourse
Is he a one-time aberration
Or will his example
Permanently scar the nation?

THE FAR-RIGHT: PUTIN’S PALS

 

What does Majorie Taylor Greene
Have against Ukraine?
Perhaps her sympathies are with Putin
As he seeks to expand his domain
 
And what about those other
Far-right Republicans?
Many decades ago the far-right
Were anti-communist Americans
 
They have now morphed into
Some murky, muddled back-water
Tossing out gibberish
And seemingly without much sense of order

YOUNGKIN GETS YOINKED

 

Gov Glenn Youngkin of Virginia
Can’t get much right
His latest apparent defeat
Was an attempt to ram an arena
Down the throats of Northern Virginians
Who were apathetic about such a treat
 
It’s alright, Glenn
In early 2026 you can resume
Your high finance career
And leave the politicians to their gloom

REPROBATE SELLING BIBLES

 

The Orange Huckster is selling bibles
Which some might consider inappropriate
In view of the Huckster being
Something of a reprobate
 
One definition of a reprobate
Is a person rejected by the Almighty
And beyond hope of salvation
The Huckster might not be there
But that seems his destination
 
Meanwhile,
NBC got the message
Ronna McDaniel, former RNC Chief
Is too much a Huckster apologist
To have any credence
As an NBC analyst

NOT LIKE YOU AND ME

 

The slippery Orange Huckster
Got a huge bond reduction
Hey, ordinary citizen
Think you’d get the same conclusion?
 
But let’s be honest
With all the Huckster
Has done for the nation
He’s certainly entitled
To special consideration

WHAT IS NBC THINKING?

 

Ronna McDaniel
Former RNC Chief
And a one-time election denier
Has been hired by NBC
Drawing from the bona fide
Journalists and commentators
A crescendo of fire
 
Maybe going a bit too far, NBC
Who’s the next hire?
The Orange Huckster himself?
Now, that would bring some real fire

A PUTIN BUNGLE

 

The U.S. warned Putin
That ISIS was coming
Putin must’a thought
Biden was just funning
 
So ISIS showed up
And caught Putin flat-footed
But he wants to blame Ukraine
His dis-honesty is deep-rooted
 
When are the Russian people
Gonna grow a pair
And say goodbye to Putin
A pathetic Russian bear?

WILL THE BOND MATERIALIZE?

 

A strange day
The Orange Huckster is not much evident
British royalty, Moscow terrorist attack
Congressional budget deadline, basketball
Render the Huckster not very relevant
 
But he seems geared up for Monday
His deadline for a half-billion dollar bond
What surprise will he spring
Before the clock goes ding-dong?

BABY SITTER FOR THE HUCKSTER

 

The Orange Huckster has a baby sitter
A monitor has been instructed
To check the books
To keep an eye on the organization
Particularly to make sure assets
Do not suffer “evaporation”
 
The Huckster has until Monday
To find a bond benefactor
Don’t be surprised if Putin
Appears as the savior

HALF A BILLION

 

Half a billion
Is all the Orange Huckster needs
And by Monday please
Or the New York AG
Can start taking his property
 
Will once again a court
Let him skate away
And avoid the consequences
An ordinary citizen
Would have to pay?

A PARDON MAY BE IN YOUR FUTURE

 

Were you convicted
Of a Jan 6 crime?
The Odious Orange Huckster is promising
A pardon for your time
 
So vote for the Huckster
Clear your name
Then stand back and stand by
He may need more of the same
 
Navarro’s going to prison
His own description
While the clown who motivated him
Is free for the next sedition

HUCKSTER GETTING HUCKED

 

The Orange Huckster is claiming inability
To finance a half-billion dollar bond
No insurance company wants
To get near the Huckster’s scummy pond
 
Maybe time to try selling
Mar-a-Lago and Trump Towers
Or maybe the Huckster could
Hang around intersections selling flowers

BIBI’S BANANA REPUBLIC

 

Bibi Netanyahu is mad
Senator Schumer said his time should be up
Bibi accuses Schumer
Of Banana Republic conduct
But the reality is Bibi
Exemplifies a perfect Banana Republic product

BLOOD BATH

 

In an Ohio rally the Orange Huckster
Predicted a “blood bath”
If he loses the election
So he’s obviously laying the groundwork
For another attempt at an insurrection
 
Where does the Huckster fit
In the American history narration?
Somewhere below Al Capone
And the 1930s Great Depression

MIKE DISSES THE HUCKSTER

 

Mike Pence isn’t endorsing
His old boss
The Orange Huckster probably
Won’t understand why this loss
 
As he doesn’t understand
Much of anything
His grasp of reality
Is pretty much fantasy

RUSSIAN “ELECTION”

 

Russia is having an “election”
Best not to snicker
It’s the type of “election” that
Might be instituted by the Orange Huckster
 
Meanwhile,
SpaceX’s third Starship launch
Was a resounding engineering victory
Except for the small matter that
It went missing on re-entry
 
So who will be the first Astronaut
To ride this fragile baby?
Better pick someone who
Has shown they are really lucky

DOOMSDAY

 

Putin is again
Threatening the nuclear option
Would he really
Make the doomsday selection?
 
Probably unlikely
But unless we humans
Can get our act together
Sometime in the future
A deranged all-powerful autocrat
Will pull the trigger

CONFIDENTIAL DOCS

 

Joe Biden, Mike Pence
Hillary Clinton, the Orange Huckster
Who was the most flagrant
Confidential Docs offender?
 
The Huckster by a mile
When investigated the others cooperated
But the Huckster concealed, delayed,
Distorted, and prevaricated

SEVEN MONTHS OUT

 

Uncle Joe has gotten feisty
Full of vim and vigor
Maybe you should pace yourself, Joe
Got more than seven months to go
Don’t wanna be outta steam
Along about Halloween
 
Meanwhile the Orange Huckster
Has gotten even more outrageous
His MAGA worshipers love it
But is their enthusiasm contagious?
Or are their fellow citizens repelled
By the possibility of a President
Who is so flagrantly seditious?

HI THERE

 

When meeting someone on the street
Some people say “Hi There”
A few find this confusing
Believing they’re not there but here

AMERICA’S SHAME

 

Are Congressional Republicans
Really prepared to allow Putin
To have his way in Ukraine
An outcome that history would view
As America’s shame?
 
Speaking of America’s shame
The Orange Huckster has been driven
By Joe’s State of the Union Address
To excesses of rhetorical drivel
Including suggestions for political unrest

DISGRUNTLED

 

MAGA Republicans are generally disgruntled
After Uncle Joe’s State of the Union success
How dare he appear Presidential
When they had expected an octogenarian mess
 
Marjorie Taylor Greene refused
To remove her MAGA hat
The rules don’t apply to her
She’s a Peach State mountain rat
 
Alabama Senator Katie Britt
Delivered the Republican rebuttal
She did not impress her own party
Leaving many GOPers befuddled

OUTTA THE PARK

 

Uncle Joe didn’t screw up (much)
Indeed, he hit it outta the park
Now can he hold it together
For the next eight months
Maintaining the same spark?

RUNNING OUT OF DEFENSES

 

The dysfunctional polarized Republican Party
Has caved to the Orange Huckster
The next hurdle for the potential autocrat
Is a mishmash of legal matters
Which could be a judicial barrier
 
The nation’s courts
Including the Supreme One
Are working through a maze of issues
But by election day
Probably won’t be done
 
So it appears
Voters will be the last protection
Against the destruction of democracy
By the instigator of an insurrection

KAMALA VERSUS NIKKI

 

What if Father Time
The Hand of Justice
The Fickle Finger of Fate
Or some similar higher power
Strikes before the election date?
 
Then it just might be
Kamala versus Nikki
Each of which meet the criterion
Of not being a threat to democracy
 
Of course, Uncle Joe
Is also not a threat
But that other guy
Is most definitely
An autocratic cadet

SUPREME GALS AND GUYS

 

The Supremes have spoken
They said states
Can’t disqualify those
Who want to be Presidential candidates
 
But interestingly
On the scope of the decision
The gals and the guys
Did not have the same opinion
 
The five guys
Expounded broadly
The five gals
More narrowly and conservatively
 
What does this portend
For the eventual decision
On Presidential immunity?
No clue here
That one remains a mystery

CHALLENGE FOR JOE

 

State of the Union on Thursday
Uncle Joe better be sharp
Any verbal gaffe or deficiency
Will be pounced on as evidence
Of developing cognitive insufficiency
 
Think House Republicans
Will be able to control themselves?
Most likely they will be cavorting around
Like naughty little elves

AN ELUSIVE ISSUE

 

Will America ever
Come to grips with abortion
Or will it continue meandering
Through the morass of
Law, religion, morality, condemning,
Opinion, not caring, forgiving?

THE ORANGE PIMPLE

 

The Orange Huckster’s trial dates
Are slipping into the future
If he wins in November
They’ll evaporate like a pimple rupture
 
Speaking of pimples
The Orange Huckster is a pimple on democracy
The nation needs to pop that pimple
Before it morphs into autocracy

RECUSAL FOR CLARENCE?

 

Will Judge Clarence Thomas
In view of wife Ginni’s participation
In the instigating of the Jan 6 insurrection
Be recused from consideration
Of any matters involving
The Orange Huckster’s legal situation?

SUPREMES AMBLE IN

 

The Supremes want in on the action
So they’re taking on Presidential Immunity
Holding the nation in suspense for months
Before articulating their views for posterity
 
And also for the Orange Huckster
Who claims absolute immunity
For actions of any sort
During his Presidency
 
The Huckster is envious of Putin
And other dictator types
Who do pretty much what they want
And don’t tolerate any gripes

MICHIGAN AS EXPECTED

 

What did Michigan Republicans say?
That most are happy to be part
Of the Orange Huckster’s army
As he marches them toward
His legacy of infamy
 
But a significant minority
Are not part of the army
And still have hope for the future
Of their threatened party

MERCEDES

 

The search is on for “Mercedes”
Who the Orange Huckster praised
Before the CPAC audience
Leaving a few eyebrows raised
 
Some say he meant his wife Melania
Others say Mercedes Schlapp
The wife of the CPAC host
But still others see a possible conspiracy
And think the Huckster is holding
Secret auditions for a new First Lady
In the event he’s returned to the Presidency

TAIL WAGS DOG

 

The MAGA tail is wagging
The Republican dog
Creating something that resembles
A snorting bloviating hog
 
Meanwhile,
Aid to Ukraine
Is apparently in limbo
Thanks to House Republicans
Carrying out the desires
Of the bloviating Orange Bimbo

SOUTH CAROLINA

 

The bad news is
Nikki lost in South Carolina
The good news is
She got almost forty percent of the vote
In a MAGA dominated party
In a MAGA dominated state
That’s something to contemplate
 
Bottom line is
The Orange Huckster lacks complete control
Of his fate
Even in a MAGA dominated state

TWO YEARS

 

Two years ago
Putin invaded Ukraine
Now the war grinds on
And House Republicans
Are feeling pain
 
Defending freedom and democracy
In a foreign land
Is losing its attraction
As their leader the Orange Huckster
Expresses his opposition
And his Putin admiration

REFUSAL TO PROCREATE

 

Next step for the Alabama Supreme Court
Is its efforts to elimination abortion
Is to realize that
A women’s refusal to engage in procreation
Is really just abortion pre-conception
 
So you studs out there
Try that reasoning on a prospective honey
And don’t be discouraged
If she looks at you funny

THE SUPREMES AND MARJORIE

 

The Supreme Court suggested
To Marjorie Taylor Greene
That she put a mask on
Then shut up
And begone

TUCKER THE BUFFOON

 

Tucker is looking
More and more the buffoon
A Putin MAGA flunky
Praising Russian shopping carts
As evidence of Russian superiority
 
He’s down in George Santos territory
Crying for attention
But mostly receiving
A lot of rejection

THE HOUSE AND UKRAINE

 

Can Dems and Pro-American Republicans
Overcome the House Pro-Putin MAGAs
And provide Ukraine needed aid
To counter the Red Army cascade?

GOLDEN SNEAKERS

 

WOW, Golden Sneakers
The latest item the Orange Huckster
Has tried hustling to gullible believers
Joining suits, cards, steaks
Vitamins, ties, mattresses
Vodka, planes, casinos
Wine, water, books
A game, cologne, college degrees

And of course,

His alleged governing expertise
 
So step right up, make a purchase
And join the MAGA circus

ACCOUNTABILITY NEARS, MAYBE

 

Many Americans are attracted
To the Orange Hoax’s posse
By his ability to reside and profit
On the edges of legality and morality
 
Is he reaching
A moment of accountability?
One can only hope
He could emerge as a genius
Or exposed as a corrupt dope

JUDICIAL SYSTEM, KEEP’EM COMING

 

The Orange Huckster went on a tirade
About a 355 million dollar judgement
Making the accusation that
It was political punishment
 
Well, if that is the case
It was certainly deserved and appropriate
Who’s more worthy of punishment
Than the chief insurrectionist advocate?

REPUBLICANS LOOK TO THE 1930s

 

Congressional Republicans are flirting with
Their party’s pre-WWII isolationism
Withhold aid to Ukraine
And let it fall to Putin’s totalitarianism
 
Such an outcome
Would most certainly be
A betrayal of a deserving democracy
And a blot on American history

VALENTINE’S DAY

 

Joe wished Jill
Happy Valentine’s Day
The Orange Huckster couldn’t remember
Which of his assault victims
Might still be acceptable prey
 
Meanwhile,
House Speaker Johnson
Is against pretty much everything
No border bill, no aid to Ukraine
Nothing that would result
In giving the Huckster any pain

WILL GOP SUCCUMB TO NEPOTISM?

 

The Odious Orange Huckster
Wants his daughter-in-law
(The hot one or the other one?)
To be co-chair of
The Republican National Committee
Which would solidify his grip
On the Lincoln-Eisenhower-Reagan Party
 
And when it concerns

The Republican Party
What the Huckster desires
He usually acquires

NFL TEAMS ARE ENVIOUS

 

The success Swifty has brought
To the Kansas City Chiefs
Is the envy of the NFL
Other teams now want a hottie
Who can cast a similar spell
 
Meanwhile,
Tucker Carlson took on Putin
Putin cleaned his clock
Spewed a half hour monologue
On Ukrainian-Russian history
Some of which was deficient
In the area of accuracy

PUTIN THE DEBT COLLECTOR

 

The Odious Orange Huckster
Encouraged his pal Valdimir
To invade NATO nations
If those nations are not current
In their NATO financial obligations
Guess Val is not just a dictator
But also the Huckster’s debt collector
 
Meanwhile,
There was a sports event in Vegas
A big game of some kind
The most significant aspect was
Swifty got there in time
To see her fellow and team shine

MOCKING AN AMERICAN SOLDIER

 

The Orange Bone Spur mocked
Nikki’s soldier husband
Who is overseas serving his country
Something the Bone Spur has not done
 
Indeed, the Bone Spur
Has a history
Of dissing American soldiers
Particularly ones killed, wounded, or captured
In the service of the country
 
In sharp contrast
To this anti-soldier dance
Is the GOP’s long-standing
Pro-service-to-the-nation stance

PRESIDENTIAL DEBATE

 

The Orange Huckster begins
By calling Joe “Obama”
Joe responds by addressing
The Huckster as “Ivanka”
The give and take commences
“You’re really senile”
“Well, you're ahead of me

By a country mile”

The debate moderator intercedes
“This is an exercise in futility
Both you gentlemen belong
In an old codger’s facility”

BIG LEGAL DAY

 

The Supremes seem likely
To reject Colorado’s argument
That the Orange Huckster
Can be kept off the ballot
Under the Fourteenth Amendment
 
Meanwhile,
Release of the Special Counsel’s report
On Joe’s classified docs difficulties
Is sure to keep alive
Questions about Joe’s cognitive abilities
 
Later Joe held a presser
In which he directly addressed the report
He was largely successful
Except for confusing Mexico and Egypt
Just a minor mental fart

REPUBLICAN CLOWN CAR

The Republican Clown Car
Continues its chaotic journey
Creating a record that is
Unique in American history
 
Latest event is that
After bemoaning the border dysfunction
And participating in bipartisan efforts
That would correct much of the situation
Senate Republicans did a one-eighty
And voted no on the final legislation 

CITIZEN TRUMP

 

A Federal Appeals Court
Has rejected the assertion
Of the Odious Orange Bone Spur
That he is immune from prosecution
 
The Court described him
As “Citizen Trump”
A moniker the Orange Bone Spur obviously
Does not think renders him
The appropriate dignity
 
Meanwhile,
Dysfunctional House Republicans
Failed in their first shot
At impeaching a Democratic Cabinet Member
Seems their vote counting wasn’t too hot

PUTIN’S PALS

House Republicans are striving
To be Putin’s Pals
No aid to Ukrainians
Notwithstanding their painful howls
 
Whatever happened to
The globalist GOP
Of the Cold War years?
Apparently to please the Orange Huckster
It shifted gears
From opposing totalitarian dictators
To giving them cheers

 

AGING LEADER

 

If you must have an oldster

As the nation’s leader
Which do you prefer?
One who has gotten a bit slow
But is still basically rational
And when his advisers talk
A comprehending listener?
 
Or one who’s belligerence, hostility
And narcissism
Are increasing significantly
As is his fabricating tendency
And who overrides any advisory efforts
With his own flawed certainty?

HOSTILITIES WITH IRAN?

 

Will the situation in the Middle East
Result in open hostilities
Between Iran and America?
Or will the murky status quo continue
And the only actual fighting
Be with a random local militia?
 
Meanwhile, Joe is trouncing’em
In the South Carolina primary
Who’s he running against?
Don’t recognize the names
But they are formidable undoubtedly

IMORTANT TOPICS

 

Joe has begun
A serious and likely lengthy operation
Against loose-cannon Middle East militias
That have become more than a mere distraction
 
Regarding an equally important international matter
The expectation is that Swifty
Will be able to get
From Japan to Los Vegas
In time for a Super Bowl whisky
And maybe a Kansas City victory
 
Although the intellectually deep MAGA crowd
Has come upon a deep conspiracy
Involving Swifty, the Super Bowl, endorsements
That could change the course of history
The reasoning and evidence are much too murky
to discuss through poetry
Calculus and quadradic equations
might be more appropriate tools  
to dissect the mystery

SLIM LEAD

In a CNN poll
The Orange Huckster has a slim lead
How is that possible
When he’s such a stinkweed?
 
Alternatively, for the more vulgar

The Orange Huckster has a slim lead
In a CNN poll
How is that possible
When he’s such an ahole?
 
In any case
Apparently a goodly number of citizens
Really like the dude
But another goodly number of citizens
Think he’s the epitome of ineptitude
With morals and an intellect
That are unglued