STRANGE BEDFELLOWS

The Orange Outrage and Democrats

Have something in common

Neither is bothered by debt

So spending is no problem

They have reportedly reached

A significant budget agreement

That would increase the national debt

Is that really an achievement?

With the National Emergency and Dems

Will Republicans go along?

Or will they finally find

A little anti-Trump backbone?

MIXED UP COUNTRY

The National Emergency said

“Right now Iran

Is a very mixed up country”

Well that’s really grand

But oh, Great Orange Bozo

Have you checked your own country

It’s also pretty mixed up

Mostly thanks to your incompetency

And what about that new threat

To obliterate Afghanistan in ten days?

Wouldn’t you need Congressional approval

Or is the Constitution now just blue haze?

WHERE IS RUDY?

One of the National Emergency’s court jesters

Hasn’t been seen much lately

Is Guiliani in the dog house

Or just playing hooky?

Perhaps he didn’t use “Sir”

When speaking to Lord Trump

And for that he’s been punished

By consignment to the political dump

Rudy was a wonder

His convoluted defenses of the boss

Were highly entertaining

And certainly a great loss

BULLY OR BIGOT?

Is the National Emergency

More bigot than bully?

Or does his bullying

Define him for posterity?

It’s certainly a close call

Bullying is most definitely

His “leadership” style

But bigotry he seems to enjoy personally

Speaking of leadership

As a leader his score

Is way down under

The cellar door

STRUTTING YOUR STUFF

A fundamental belief in America is that

All men and women are created equal

It may be true at a spiritual level

But how about the material?

Some are born to poverty

Some are born to adequacy

And some are born to money

From a real estate developer daddy

In a just and fair world

Those with wealth

Would feel a little humility

And not strut their stuff

But in the real world

Obnoxiously strutting your stuff

Is apparently the major reason

To acquire and hoard wealth

"SEND HER BACK"

The National Emergency suggests

“Send her back”

Was not what he really meant

It was just an off-the-cuff crack

Lindsey Graham and cronies

Are trying to keep abreast

Of the Orange Possum’s bigotry

But it’s proving quite a test

How much do they agree?

What qualifications do they express?

Can they preserve their moral standing

By treating it all in jest?

Without the support of sycophants

History’s many evil-doers

Would not have been successful

In their destructive endeavors

DIVIDE AMERICA

Divide America

That’s the Orange Possum’s strategy

For winning in 2020

And maintaining his Royalty

A President like no other

A bully to deplore

Yet many Americans

Don’t want him to leave the floor

They like his message

Of hatred and bigotry

They like being the victims

Of imagined savagery

Live and let live

Is not their motto

It’s more like

I’m gonna cut off your toe

BORN IN THE USA?

Was the Orange Possum

Born in this country

Or is he an illegal immigrant

From someplace really funky?

With little respect for our traditions and laws

He certainly doesn’t act American

He acts like someone sent here

To create a societal hurricane 

To put an end to our existence

As a free and vibrant nation

To con us into accepting

An autocratic, incompetent Administration 

Let’s see his birth certificate

It’s most likely a forgery

Created in some far-off land

To conceal his true story

BRINGING AMERICA TOGETHER, NOT

Bringing people together

Is not our President’s goal

He wants to drive us apart

The hell with the toll

His constituency is the rabble

Who think with their fists

Who have no doubt at all

About violence against those who resist

The Orange Possum speaks only to them

And not to peaceful citizens

Who view violent language as creating

dangerous national schisms

BACK TO WHERE THEY CAME FROM

The Pudgy Orange Possum

Is really prattling racism

Essentially claiming white males

Are the essence of civilization

He wants certain Congresspersons

To return from whence they came

Fix up their home countries

Take ownership of blame

Well, Orange Possum

Why don’t you return

To your dictatorial origins

For which you obviously yearn

ROUND 'EM UP

Raids allegedly beginning Sunday

Rounding up the illegals

At least some of them anyway

Enough for the National Emergency’s beagles

To claim self-laudatory credit

For being tough on immigration

For protecting the American dream

From a brown people invasion

Can’t round up too many, however

Else the Trump Hotels and Golf Courses

Will be without the people who work

And left with only bosses

IS ANYONE LEFT?

Does the LMA’s Administration

Have anyone still around?

Or have they all quit, been fired

Or found a hole in the ground?

Government by vacancies

And acting personnel

Is how the National Emergency

Is draining the swampy well

Business schools will focus

In the decades ahead

On how a President tried to make

The Government real dead

LOOK OUT! THE ORANGE ONE BACKED DOWN!

The National Emergency backed down

No citizenship census question

He doesn’t like to lose

In such a public fashion

So he’ll likely attack elsewhere

Anything to erase the stain

Of a humiliating retreat

From such obvious pain

So hold onto your hats

The ship is about to sail

To another crisis

From which we will have to bail

WITH A FRIEND LIKE THIS . . .

“I never even knew the guy”

Is the LMA’s standard statement

When the time comes to throw some poor sap

Out of the White House basement

The LMA never had a friend

He did not like

Until the time came to say

“Take a hike”

And then the past is erased

Damage control ensues

Names are scrubbed from invitations

Photos labeled false news

AMY vs MITCH

Mitch McConnell has mastered

The arcane rules of Senate activity

To the extent that’s he’s ensured

Considerable Senate non-activity

About the only thing his Senate does

Is approve right wing elites

For Judicial and Administrative positions

Responding to his President’s tweets

A challenger has appeared on the scene

A combat veteran extraordinaire

A female graduate of the Naval Academy

Who’s undertaken a patriotic dare

Can she win in Kentucky?

That’s a brutal question

But Amy McGrath just might

Give Mitch a job termination

DEMS TAKE AIM AT FOOT, PULL TRIGGER

If Dems insist on rehashing events

From forty years ago

They increase the risk of four more years

With their Orange foe

All the free stuff they’re promising

Health, college, forgiveness for everything

Get real, Squabbling People

If you desire the election to win

Meanwhile the Orange LMA

Is trying to protect his financial history

They’re coming at him from many directions

Hoping to expose his duplicity

The British Ambassador

Called him inept

Blimey, Mate, you just noticed?

You must have overslept

NEW MONIKER ADDED TO INVENTORY

Time for an additional moniker

For the National Emergency

An important decision

Requiring careful study

And we have a winner

LMA joins the rest

“LM” stands for Loud Mouth

“A” you can probably guess

So welcome LMA

You capture our feelings

How long is your run

Will depend on electoral dealings

MILITARY OPS CADET BONE SPURS DIDN’T MENTION

The First Colonial Airborne Brigade

Parachuted into Yorktown

Overcoming heavy machinegun fire

From the Brits on the ground

Air Assault troops

From the Third Rhode Island Infantry

Rappelled from choppers onto Hessians

Bickering about their home leave policy

The MREs of 1812

Were particularly unpalatable

Freeze-dry rat was not appreciated

By Andrew Jackson’s rabble

Speaking of Andrew Jackson

He would likely be proud

Of the governmental chaos created

By the National Emergency and his crowd

THE COLONIAL AIR FORCE

History is a great thing

Particularly when facts don’t matter

You can say ridiculous stuff

As you chatter, chatter, chatter

The Colonials were bogged down

Just outside of Yorktown

And then the Colonial Air Force

Arrived on the scene

Dropping fiery napalm

Making the British scream

Napalm also saved the day

For the North at Shiloh

A few sorties over Johnny Reb

And he said Goodbye-o

Johnny Reb had

An Air Force also

Only the pilots were usually

Too inebriated to go

CADET BONE SPURS HAS HIS FOURTH

He did not mention

The greatest soldier of all

That would be Cadet Bone Spurs

Who did not drop the ball

Except when the time came

To show up for a war

He chose instead

To stay home in bed

But he deserves a Purple Heart

For standing in the rain

Having his hair matted down

His bone spurs in pain

HEY GENERALISSIMO, TAKE A BREAK

Immigrants, tanks

Census questions, pranks

Life under a Generalissimo

Is certainly fun

Like living under

Attila the Hun

Being a captive audience

Is not something that

Many citizens enjoy

When the lead actor is a quack

So we roll into

A major national holiday

Astride a tank

And tanks ain’t for play

THE ORANGE GENERALISSIMO

As the National Emergency morphs

Into the Orange Generalissimo

He is set on

A military show

Which he said would feature

Abrams and Sherman tanks

The Shermans not having been around

Since Americans were called “Yanks”

Doesn’t create much confidence

That the Commander in Chief

Is ignorant about what weapons

The nation has in its sheath

Hey Generalissimo

I understand

Many flintlock muskets

Are still on hand

TANKS IN THE STREETS

The Orange Emperor announced

Tanks are in his July Fourth event

Is he planning a celebration

Or a takeover of the government?

The American Mussolini

Spent his time in the Far East

With dictators and autocrats

Threatening world peace

He showed no respect

For democratic leaders

Preferring sucking up to

Strong-men wheeler-dealers

KOREAN CHEMISTRY

The National Emergency claims “chemistry”

With various autocrats

Is this anything like his “chemistry”

With porn star hazmats?

The National Emergency thinks he’s scored

Some kinda media victory

Setting his feet in North Korea

despite knowing little of its history

Let’s see if this bit

Of social media entertainment

Leads to the denuclearization

Of Kim Jong Un’s battlement

GET REAL, DEMOCRATS

Free college, free health services

Free everything in town

A segment of the Democratic Party

Wants free stuff all around

How they gonna pay for it?

Apparently not a concern

Just unleash the money machine

And hope it don’t burn

If Democrats don’t tone it down

They may turn off the middle class

And end up with the National Emergency

Having the last laugh

DEMOCRATIC DEBATES

Kamala Harris

Shut ‘em up

Maybe she’s what’s needed

To end the years of Trump

Joe’s a good man

So is Bernie

But they too much remind us

Of the final gurney

Among the rest

Elizabeth’s not bad

Just a bit too ebullient

For this ol’ granddad

And as for those guys

Yaking away in Spanish

Impressive I guess

But was it in jest?

Chuckie Boy Todd

Needs a new look

That growth on his face

Makes him seem a crook

GOP, PARTY OF GOVERNMENT DEBT

The Congressional Budget Office

A non-partisan group

Has exposed the stink

In the Trump-GOP economic poop

The CBO estimates the national debt

Will increase in thirty years

From 78 percent of GDP

To 144 percent in arrears

Much of the increase thanks

To the Trump tax cut

Which contrary to Pouty Mouth’s promise

Is keeping federal revenues in a rut

So debt, the National Emergency’s

Second favorite economic weapon

(tariffs being the first)

Is on a path to bankrupt

The nation’s precious purse

OFF TO THE G20

The National Emergency

Is off to Japan

To meet with the G20

And maybe ride in a sampan

A ride he could’a had

Fifty years ago

If his bone spurs hadn’t

Dealt his health a blow

Maybe other G20 members

View the National Emergency

As a failed Apprentice

A guy who tried and proved incompetent

But is still a menace

Or maybe they’ll play a few jokes

Give each other a nudge and a wink

And tell the National Emergency

There was a big ol’ fly in his drink 

NOT MY TYPE

The National Emergency said

She wasn’t his type

Meaning he only assaults those

Whose type he finds ripe?

And was “cocked and loaded”

A Freudian slip?

“locked and loaded”

Is the usual cliché blip

And suggesting that Biden

Has lost a step or four

Coming from Vacant Head

That’s opening quite a barn door

 😆     😈     😍     😾

COUGH OF THE DAY

“She’s not my type.” (Cough)

THE NATIONAL EMERGENCY’S NOT KIDDING

Gonna get them Iranians

Gonna starve them until

They kowtow to the National Emergency

Which might be a cold day in hell

Remember that this was all started

By the National Emergency himself

In an effort to make his predecessor

Seem not very tough

GOVERNING BY PUBLIC ULTIMATUM

Public ultimatums

They’re part of his show

Serious governing

He just doesn’t know

Threats and bombast

Was how he did The Apprentice

Real people in the real world

View such stuff as a menace

His goals are

Praise and adulation

Concrete results

Are of secondary consideration