HAPPY B’DAY!

 

March 1, the spouse’s b’day
For the next two months
We’re the same age
And then in May
I turn the page

UKRAINE’S EXAMPLE

 

What will be the outcome?
The future is certainly not clear
Many lives will likely be lost
But the example of Ukraine’s struggle
Against despotism and bullying
Will live on for many a year

HISTORY IS DEAD?

 

Remember back in the ‘90s
When history was declared dead?
Well, Vladimir’s invasion of Ukraine
Put that hypothesis to bed

THE SHARK BITES

 

Putin’s in deep do-do
The Federated States of Micronesia
Has taken the shark by the fins
And severed diplomatic ties with Russia

STALIN, MUSSOLINI, PUTIN, trump

The Orange Hoax regrets
He didn’t become a dictator
He didn’t get much past wannabe
Just to the level of prevaricator
 
He looks with great envy
At his buddy Putin
Who he calls a genius
For starting a war of aggression

YOUNGKIN ACOLYTES

 

Went to a medical lab
To get blood testing
Everyone was masked
And not complaining
 
Then in walked two unmasked
An elderly lady and a younger helper
They were asked to mask up by
The technician behind the counter
 
The younger lady screeched
“Youngkin says no masks”
The technician explained
Youngkin was only referring to schools
And not medical tasks
 
Reluctantly the ladies
Masked up a bit
But left uncovered their noses
Perhaps as a way of saying
“I’m a free American, cool it”

TIT FOR TAT

 

Putin sent his train
Into southeast Ukraine
Joe said not nice
You must pay a price
 
So that’s where we’re at
A dangerous tit for tat
Where will it lead?
Maybe a lotta people bleed

STANDOFFISH PUTIN

 

Ol’ Baldy Putin doesn’t like
To be near other people
Long table, chairs far-placed
Keep away the human drivel
 
Or maybe he’s got BO
Or a flatulence situation
And maintains a distance
To conceal the condition

AMERICAN PUBLIC PREPARES

 

Olympics are over
Time for Putin to prance
The world awaits
The coming Slavic dance
 
Meanwhile, in the United States
Mask or no mask
Is a vehement debate
Along with whether
Republicans or Democrats
Deserve the most hate

WAITING ON PUTIN

 

Will he or won’t he
Unleash his Slavic hoard?
The world is waiting
And is certainly not bored
 
The real unknown is
Assuming his invasion commences
What happens next
What are the consequences?
 
Will international stability
Slowly achieve restoration?
Or will it be the beginning
Of a spreading conflagration?

PUTIN

 

Why the Ukraine situation?
Because Putin feels aggrieved
Both for himself and Russia
And he can only be relieved
If Ukraine is retrieved
 
Do casualties matter?
To Putin apparently not
What matters to him is
Tying a Russia-Ukraine knot

SURE

 

When did “sure” become
A way to start a response, as in
“What do you think about [yada yada]?”
“Sure, well what I think is
[yada yada back at ya]”
 
Uses of many words
Can change over the years
Which usually leaves the older generation
Scratching their ears

GO CRYPTO

 

Cryptocurrencies
Seem really interesting
Apparently you can start your own
Just by proclaiming
That you’ve blocked a chain
And you’re open for investing
 
Then people send you dollars
And you send them tokens
Indicating that they
Have become crypto citizens
 
All your crypto needs
Is a cool name
Mine’s named “The Frip”
And I’m off to fortune and fame
So Frip you big Dude, let her rip

ANTI-GOVERNMENT REPUBLICANS

 

The Republican Party
Once defender of the status quo
And government authority
Has morphed into
The left-wing rebels
It once viewed abhorrently

SPOUSES SHARING CUBICLES

 

To deal with covid spreading
Some government agencies
With married couples on the payroll
Are placing couples together
In the same cubicle hole
 
This might curtail covid but
Maybe cause the divorce rate
To significantly accelerate
Like a race horse
Leaving the starting gate

SUPER BOWL COMMENT

 

Super Bowl, the epitome
Of the American experiment?
Well, let’s not get carried away
It’s just a big event
 
When TV introduces the players
Why stop with their colleges?
Why not give their degrees
And grade point averages?

NUANCE

What’s wrong with
Modern society?
Maybe loss of nuance
Is reinforcing polarity
 
In the media
Both social and news
Issues become A or B
Black or white
Wrong or right
The middle ground and
Rational discourse become
Lost in the twilight

FIFTEEN FLUSHES

 

Why does the Hoax’s commode
Require fifteen flushes
To dispose of a load?
 
Because he uses the porcelain receptacle
Not just for his
Undoubtedly enormous defecations
But as a general disposal system
For papers, food, and assorted tangible irritations

NO SOUP FOR YOU

 

Marjorie Taylor Greene
Seems to believe
Jerry Seinfeld’s Soup Nazi
Has been resurrected
Thanks to Nancy Pelosi
 
According to the Georgia Rep
Nancy has turned to
Her “Gazpacho” enforcers
For dictatorial control
Over innocent legislators

JOSEPH McCARTHY AND THE HOAX

 

A Washington Post columnist
Has drawn an interesting parallel
Senator Joe McCarthy
Of the 1950s Red Scare
And the Orange Hoax
Of today’s anti-democratic fair
 
Both being demagogues
Who captured the Republican base
Both relying on lies
To gain and hold their place
 
Much of the Republican base
Is a rebellious clan
But sometimes it slides into worshipping
A tough-talking orangutan

THE INFAMOUS SHARPIE

 

An historically important Sharpie
Was rescued from Mar-a-Lago
Where the Hoax had taken it
When from the White House he had to go
 
The Hoax had used the Sharpie
To alter a weather map
To support his inaccurate statement
About a storm track
 
The Smithsonian is where
The Sharpie should reside
On display as evidence
Of the Hoax’s wild ride

CRYPTO ORGY

 

Matt Damon was once
Jason Bourne
Now he’s peddling
Crypto porn
 

Meanwhile
Non-fungible tokens
Have become a craze
Leaving rational people
In a daze
 
This crypto thing
Is getting out of hand
Maybe it’s time
To join the band
 
If the loonies are right
And there’s free money out there
Don’t wanna miss out
So get outta your chair
 
Buy a blockchain
Or whatever is necessary
Join the cognoscenti
In the crypto orgy

SNAKE OIL SALESMEN

 

“Snake oil salesmen” are how
The Hoax’s post-election advisers
Are currently being described
But isn’t that the needed profile

When the advisee is

A nasty slithery reptile?

MIKE PENCE STEPS UP

 

Former VP Mike Pence
Stepped to the plate
Took a hefty swing and sent
A line drive at his one-time mate
 
Might this action begin
The Republican Party’s extraction
From the soul-destroying clutches of
The Orange Hoax’s putrefaction?

YOUNGKIN VENTURES OUT

 

“Read the room, Buddy”
Was how one bystander
Chastised maskless Guv Youngkin
When he visited deep-blue Alexandria
 
Guv, maybe you oughta
Confine your wandering
To the red sections of Virginia
Where the natives are more welcoming

THE COMMIES HAVE COME

 

The Commies have come to DC
Courtesy of Dan Snyder and company
Why pick a pompous identity
The morphs so easily
Into parody and comedy?

MINIMUM WAGE AND RICH GUV

 

Republicans in Virginia’s House of Delegates
Want a minimum wage retreat
To what it was before
Multimillionaire Youngkin came on the beat
 
What say you, Guv?
Do you support this bid
To squash those at the bottom
Of the economy’s pyramid?

HOAX ON THE RAMPAGE

 

The Hoax is on quite a streak

He’s confessed to seeking
The overturn of the election
He’s threatened mayhem against
Authorities conducting legal investigation
He’s been revealed as
Tearing up official documentation
He’s suggested pardons for those
Who took part in insurrection
 
But not to worry
Most Republicans are forgiving
Whatever the Hoax does
They don’t consider it really sinning