KIM SETS AN EXAMPLE

The Greatest Hoax Ever’s admiration

For Kim Jong Un really rose

When he learned how Kim

Keeps his staff on their toes

Kim is alleged to have executed

His chief negotiator and planner

After the most recent failed summit

With the Greatest Hoax Ever

So Pompeo be on your toes

A screw-up here and there

And you could be dead meat

Courtesy of a National Emergency glare

IMPEACH

“Dirty, filthy, disgusting”

Was how the Greatest Hoax Ever

Described the word “impeach”

Or maybe he was just trying to be clever

Although he appeared

Considerably overwrought

About to lose his marbles

Personification of a dork

Should he be impeached?

Well certainly, if there were no other considerations

But there is a monumental obstacle

Republicans manning the Senate fortifications

Absent an obvious smoking gun

Such as the National Emergency with his pants down

Mitch and his boys

Will stick with the Presidential clown

MUELLER SPEAKS!

Yes, he actually has a voice!

The media went quite berserk

Analyzing every word, pause, stumble

And interviewing every last opinionated jerk

How does one get a job, anyway

Among the opinionated jerks

Where does one apply

And what are the perks?

In any event, the National Emergency and his team

Said Mueller didn’t point to the jailhouse door

Democrats on the other hand

Said Mueller confirmed crimes galore

So the give and take continues

Perhaps never to end

Until the voters say enough

And throw out the Pathetic Orange Hen

WHO ARE WE?

What about those Republicans

Who still support the Greatest Hoax Ever

What are we to make of them

Can damaged relationships recover?

The Korean Dictator Kim Jong Un

The Saudi killer MBS

Heros to our President

What does that say about us?

Hopefully if the National Emergency

Is the Republican candidate in two years

We will correct our mistake

And celebrate with many, many beers

MEMORIAL DAY, AND PRAISE FOR KIM JONG UN

Memorial Day, and the National Emergency

Praises Kim Jong Un, world peace menace

Says he’s not “personally bothered”

By Kim’s nuclear missile fetish

How them bone spurs doing

Oh great 60’s draft avoider?

Maybe they’ll return in time

To keep you from another hostile encounter

What are you planning to tell

Air Force Academy grads this week?

Some war stories about your service?

No need to be humble and meek

EXCUSE ME, EXCUSE ME

The National Emergency’s secret weapon

In dominating conversation and discourse

Is he avoids those forums

Where his audience has any recourse

White House driveway soliloquies

Abbreviated press photo ops

Such one-sided occasions provide

The majority of his props

And if he is challenged he has mastered

The perfect tough-guy put down

“Excuse me, Excuse me” he shouts

And his interrogator slinks to the ground

GREATEST HOAX EVER II

The National Emergency is morphing into

The Greatest Hoax Ever

An embarrassment to the nation

Surpassing even Millard Fillmore

Who really wasn’t that bad

He was a normal human being

Unlike the Greatest Hoax Ever

Whose humanity is defined by his spleen

This is a guy whose conduct

Is overly aggressive if not downright fascist

Who strives for chaos and conflict

Who at best is a borderline racist

The hoax he perpetuated

Was that he was a normal human being

Not some strange creature devoid

Of empathy, judgement, and rational thinking

GREATEST HOAX EVER

The National Emergency says he’s the victim

Of the Greatest Hoax Ever

Not quite sure what he’s talking about

Probably just his usual blather

More undisciplined drivel

Comes outta his mouth

Than bees from a hive

Just attacked by a sloth

At outlandish exaggeration

The Orange One has found his specialty

Indeed at spouting hyperbole

He may be the best in all history

VERY STABLE GENIUS

Nancy said the National Emergency

Needs an intervention

Either that or he

Should be in detention

Intervention by his family and staff

Yeah, that would work well

Putting sycophants in charge

Of ringing the National Emergency’s bell

Yesterday he had staff

Publicly proclaim his sanity

That he was a very stable genius

And mentally still quite handy

How will you suck-ups
Look back on your performance?
Will it make your top-ten list
Of regrets quite enormous?

TEMPER TANTRUM

The Petulant Adolescent

Who is the National Emergency

Had a temper tantrum

Focused on Nancy Pelosi

At least that’s what it seemed

But possibly the real purpose

Was to distract attention

From his inability to focus

On anything but himself

And his need for adulation

The hell with the country

He requires our unquestioned gratification

POWER STRUGGLE

Democrats request, demand, subpoena

National Emergency simply says no

Is this how the process

Will continue to go?

Has the National Emergency

Rebalanced the balance of power

Among the three branches of government

Elevating the Executive to the ivory tower?

Pelosi, Nader, and crew

Better get your act together

Else you will find yourselves

Far removed from the national rudder

PRESS BRIEFINGS KAPUT

In the National Emergency’s era

Press briefings have mostly ceased

Information is now disseminated

In the White House driveway grease

It’s like shooting the bull with your neighbor

As you’re taking out the garbage

Anything you hear or say

Is certainly not intellectual arbitrage

Does Sarah Huckabee Sanders

Still have employment?

Getting paid for doing nothing

Must be quite an enjoyment

A LITTLE TIME OFF?

What’s in the National Emergency’s

Craw this day?

Did he forget

his daily bray?

He can’t be taking a break

It’s not in his job description

He has to be constantly in motion

Bringing us national disruption

Opps, this just in

The National Emergency has twitter tiraded

Michigan Republican Justin Amash

For saying impeachment should be priority rated

MORE ON THE FOURTH

With competing celebrations

The July Fourth holiday

Won’t be a fuzzy bore

But is shaping up quite excitingly

At one end of the Mall will be The Donald

At the other end a star-studded show

In between will be a nation

Wondering which way to go

The National Emergency will yell

“Are you great Americans with me?”

The star-studded show will answer “No”

The National Emergency will reply “In that case

I’m gonna make Iran glow”

MICROMANAGER IN CHIEF

The National Emergency

Is a Micromanager in Chief

He agonizes over trivia

While ignoring the beef

For his border wall

He spends time debating

Bars versus slats

Snakes versus bats

Bollards versus spikes

Drones versus kites

Concrete versus steel

Mines versus a banana peel

He wants to move the fireworks

For the July Fourth celebration

From the National Mall

To a golf course of his creation

It won’t be long before he tackles

A national dress code

For men coats and ties

For women cleavage and thighs

SCHEMERS

The National Emergency wants

To eliminate the Dreamers

And restrict immigration to

Those like him, Schemers

We don’t need

Poor hard workers

What we need are

Rich tax-avoiders

In the National Emergency’s own image

Those he can appreciate

Can pal with all day

Who from autocracy won’t deviate

IRAN

The National Emergency is looking for someone

To beat the snot out of

It would prove he’s a man

And not some whimpering dove

Iran is the latest

On his tough guy radar

Maybe some bombs for them

And then a victory cigar

Except he doesn’t smoke

Not even drink

His vices are limited to lying, adultery,

And peeing in the sink

POMPEO VISITS RUSSIA

Pompeo tried to put

Putin on notice

Putin hadn’t laughed so hard

Since Bush-Cheney emerged from the forest

Putin said “candidly

You clowns are a joke

Stick to your tariffs

Or you’ll have a stroke”

Meanwhile the National Emergency

Has found a new hero

Some Eastern European autocrat

Who on Democracy gets a zero

ART OF NO DEAL

The Financial Genius Extraordinaire

Is doing The Art of the Deal

As if the art consisted of

Stomping your deal partner with your heel

But in the international arena

The Alleged Financial Genius

Is the one getting stomped

By everybody in the business

Russia, China, North Korea

They all have his number

Will we accompany him down

When they let loose the thunder?

SHAPING UP TO BE A GREAT 4TH, NOT

The National Emergency wants

The July Fourth Celebration

To be more about him

And his Administration

And he’d love to parade

Some military hardware

Enough to impress

The goobers in long underwear

Meanwhile China gives him the bird

Putin says stay out of Venezuela

Kim Jong Un says no nukes my ass

And Biden has his number

TARIFFS AND TRADE WARS

Tariffs and trade wars

Wet the National Emergency’s appetite

He thinks he knows

That stuff really tight

But does he have a clue?

Or is his understanding

Mired in 1922?

He thinks it’s as simple

As winners and losers

But determining who is who

Is like differentiating addicts from boozers

RUDY

Rudy Giuliani

Is heading to Ukraine

Which is something

Difficult to explain

From the nation’s mayor

To a national clown

Rudy has certainly

Morphed in direction down

Rudy is succeeding

In earning fame and blame

As apart of

The National Emergency’s con game

NO DEPRECIATION ADJUSTMENT IN FOREIGN AFFAIRS

If the National Emergency is to succeed

In the international arena

He needs to find the equivalent

Of the depreciation erasure

His survival in business

Was due to two factors

Money from Daddy

And tax law contractors

Indeed without depreciation deductions

Instead of a marginal real estate developer

What he would have likely become

Is a complete business failure

OBNOXIOUS RICH GUYS

A legacy of the National Emergency’s Presidency

Might be a strong dislike of the rich

Those clowns who benefited from tax reform

While the rest of us stayed in the ditch

We have a President whose financial acumen

Lies in how to milk depreciation

Who for years paid no taxes at all

While ordinary mortals carried the financial ball

Is a French Revolution approach

To the undeserving wealthy in store?

Perhaps they could forestall it

By showing the National Emergency the door

MITCH AND JERRY

Mitch McConnell says

It’s time to move on

The Mueller Report

Is done and gone

Mitch is like

A Mafia boss

Cross him and

Risk a big loss

Meanwhile, Jerry Falwell Jr.

Liberty University President

Allegedly used the National Emergency’s fixer

To bury an incident

So fervent yet so hypocritical

That’s much of the religious right

It would explain the National Emergency

Becoming their guiding light

SO MUCH FOR THE RULE OF LAW

450 former prosecutors say

The National Emergency would’a been charged

If he didn’t have parking privileges

At the White House garage

And now his buddy "Munchkin"

The Secretary of the Treasury

Says no to Democrats’ demands

For the National Emergency’s tax history

An epic Constitutional battle is brewing

The governmental balance of power is threatened

An inept President backed by the Supreme Court

Could move the nation in an autocratic direction

WHO ASKED YA'?

Is there any subject he won’t spout off on?

Him being the National Emergency

The latest topic beyond his job description

Is the Kentucky Derby

Hey Orange Head

Nobody cares what you think

About a horse race in Kentucky

Stick to things you know about

The silence would be just ducky

GREAT ECONOMY, BUT WHOSE IS IT?

The economy has added jobs

For a record 103 straight months

Prompting some to proclaim

The National Emergency is no economic dunce

But only 28 of those months were his

Leaving 75 for Obama

Opps, must pause here for a moment

To consider the Republican dilemma

Regarding giving any credit at all

To the National Emergency’s predecessor

Who did the heavy lifting

Of capping the Bush-Cheney economic disaster

PHONE CHAT

Putin and the National Emergency

Had an hour-long phone chat

One thing they discussed was Venezuela

and Putin said “I want that”

The National Emergency said

Go right ahead

That country gives me a headache

And all its oil has turned to lead

And so Russian troops

Are possible in South America

Maybe they’ll do R&R

At the Mar-a-Lago border

AG BARR AND LEGAL ETHICS

When AG Barr

Went to law school

He apparently spent the ethics class

Sitting on a bar stool

Which means he fits right in

With the ethics challenged crowd

Of which the National Emergency

Is very, very proud

Did Barr lie to Congress?

Well, let’s put it this way

The truth, whole truth,

And nothing but the truth

Was not what he managed to say

AG BARR VISITS THE SENATE

AG Barr

Paid the Senate a visit

Hemming and hawing

Meaningful discussion resisted

He definitely defines his job

As protecting the President

Who seems intent on

Breaking all precedent

Republicans are reaping the harvest

Of several decades putting party before country

The result is a President

Morally and ethically scummy

PRESIDENTS ONE AND FORTY-FIVE

One had some humility

Forty-Five had nada, zero, none

One served in the military

Forty-Five discovered bone spurs

And his military career was done

One never told a lie

Forty-Five can’t quit

One was honorable

Forty-Five’s life is a pit

One explored the wilderness

Forty-Five gets lost in the rough

One was the father of his country

Forty-Five is pathetic stuff