SAME OL' HOAX

 

He’s back in the groove
The same ol’ groove
A victim of many injustices
None of which
He attempted to prove
 
The lowest common denominator
Cheered him ecstatically
Most thinking citizens
Turned from Fox quickly

THE GOLDEN HOAX

 

CPAC has rolled in
A six-foot sculpture of gold
The subject is the Golden Hoax
The purpose is to worship him
So he won’t crawl back in his hole

CPAC = QANON?

 

The attendees of CPAC
Are definitely the Hoax’s party
In fact many of them
Are seriously QAnon hardy
 
How many political parties
Will be contesting the 2024 election?
The number of just two would seem
A very optimistic prediction

MITCH IS MAKING US DIZZY

 

Mitch says he’ll support
The Odious Orange Outrage
If the Outrage is the Republican candidate
On the 2024 stage
 
For an old codger
Mitch is certainly in control
Fake left, fake right
Then drive to the hole

REPUBLICAN PARTY MORPHS RIGHT

 

The Republican Party is morphing into
It’s radical far-right fringe
The party is becoming
Seriously severely unhinged

THANKS WISCONSIN

 

Wisconsin has given us
A real dingbat
Senator Ron Johnson
Far too much ear fat
 
Nancy Pelosi responsible
For storming the Capitol?
Yeah, that makes sense
She wanted her office cleaned
So she called in the rabble

VOTER SUPPRESSION

 

CPAC’s upcoming meeting
Will spend time on voter suppression
After all, how can conservatives retain power
If they don’t curtail voter participation?

EMERGING FROM HIBERNATION

 

The Hoax will emerge from hibernation
At the CPAC gaggle next Sunday
Wonder how many times he’ll mention
That he is the victim of a stolen election

LINDSEY, HOW’S IT GOING?

 

So how’s the Mar-a-Lago
Pilgrimage going, Lindsey?
You getting the Hoax in line?
You getting him straightened out?
Or is he messing with your mind?
 
You don’t have a good history
Of dealing with the Orange Outrage
One day you’re with him
The next day on a different page

LINDSEY MAKES PILGRIMAGE

 

Lindsey Graham makes a pilgrimage
To Mar-a-Lago
To try restraining the Orange Hoax
From being a complete Ahole
 
Good luck with that, Lindsey
And while you’re at it
Why don’t you stop pirouetting
Like a complete twit

TED GOES TO CANCUN

 

A blizzard hit Texas
Power out, hyperthermia
Senator Cruz took action
As the citizens are suffering
He headed to Cancun for vacation

OUT OF HIBERNATION

 

The Odious Orange Outrage
Is coming out of hibernation
Has he got any chance at all
Of repairing his reputation
So that more than just
The lowest common denominator
Pay him any attention?

ORANGE HOAX ATTACKS MITCH

 

In a viscous personal tirade
The Orange Hoax unloaded on Mitch
In response to Mitch’s unloading
On the Orange Witch
 
Thus the fight for the soul
Of the GOP steps up a notch
This could go on for months
This kicking each other in the crotch

PRESIDENTS DAY

 

The nation has had winners
And losers
And sinners
And boozers
 
And then there’s the Orange Hoax
Evidence that the Almighty
Is capable of nasty jokes

GOP NEEDS NEW NAME

 

Repuglycans, Trumplicans
Time to rename the Republican Party
Certainly it’s no longer the party of Lincoln
It has acquired far too much moral depravity
 
Honorable Conservatism has largely been squelched
What’s left are spineless politicians
Increasingly cowering before a radical base
Whose members perceive themselves as victims

With a shoutout to CC

McCONNELL ROASTS TRUMP

 

Mitch demolished the Orange Hoax
Verbally destroying him
Ran him up a tree
And sawed off his limb
 
But, you asked
He voted to acquit
If he felt so strongly
Why didn’t he find guilt?
 
Good question, and his answers were
Unsatisfactory at best
He just rambled on and on
On a technicality quest
 
The important question is
Will other Republicans come forward
With repudiations of the Hoax
Or will they cower in the corner
Deflecting inquiries with jokes?

HOW IS HE NOT GUILTY?

 

The evidence is
The Orange Hoax incited an insurrection
Against one of the three co-equal branches
Of the Federal Government organization
 
And then he refused
Over a period of hours
To send help to the Capitol
To exercise his Presidential powers

DEMS MAKE CASE

 

The Dems have made their case
But compelling as it is
It’s probably not enough
The Republicans need only say
“Acquit, or the base
Will crush your stuff”

AN AMERICAN NADIR

The violence in America’s core
Is what the Orange Hoax found
Armed with social media
He sought to take the nation down
 
He sent a mob to the Capitol
To overturn an election
Simply because he
Cannot stand rejection

HELLUVA LEGAL TEAM

 

Helluva legal team
The Orange Hoax has got
They’re on top
Cream of the crop
Hot to trot
Giving their best shot
 
But it’s all unnecessary
Because most Republican Senators
Wouldn’t convict the Orange Outrage
If he personally shot people
In broad daylight
On a public stage

FIGHT LIKE HELL

 

According to the Hoax’s defense
“Fight Like Hell” was protected speech
Just because some loons
Took him literally
Does not mean he
Has any responsibility

TALKING TRASH

 

Super Bowl Sunday
Who’s playing, you ask?
All I know is
The Hoax and Marjorie
Are talking lotta trash
 
The Hoax’s big week
Is about to start
Maybe Marjorie will help out
After all she seems pretty smart

ONCE AGAIN

 

Once again (and for the first time
In American history) the Orange Hoax has
An impeachment tryst
Fortunately for him
Enough Trumplicans exist
To likely ensure
He avoids the guilty fist

TRUMP’S PARTY

 

When asked whose party it was
Marjorie said emphatically, “Trump’s”
So there it is Republicans
Better get to Mar-a-Lago
And take your lumps

POOR MARJORIE

 

The Dems weren’t buying
Marjorie’s explanation
They view her
As a Congressional aberration
 
Republicans weren’t anxious
To aggravate their base
So they forced the Dems
To set the pace

MARJORIE AND KEVIN

 

Marjorie and Kevin
Had a meeting
Marjorie emerged with a sly grin
Kevin was on the floor
A bloody bruise on his chin

DOES EVERYONE NEED STIMULUS?

 

The Biden Administration
Is considering legislation
That would widely disburse money
Which is nice
But those not in need
Really shouldn’t get any
 
Fiscal responsibility
Has rarely been
A Democratic foundation
This could be a moment
For the party to reject
The urge to provide unnecessary gratification

HAVE A SPARE BACKBONE?

 

Backbone deficient Kevin McCarthy
What’s he gonna do?
The Marjorie Taylor Greene thing
Is becoming quite a stew
Kevin might have to make a tough decision
Something he tries to eschew