10,000 LIES AND COUNTING

The Washington Post reports

The National Emergency hit a milestone

10,000 lies and counting

Give that dog a bone!

The nation’s first President

Fella name of Washington

Never even managed one

How far we have come!

No lies and

He merely crossed the Delaware

While the National Emergency

Built gargantuan Trump Tower!

THE APPRENTICE IS CALLING

Is he still here?

The National Emergency guy

The Apprentice is calling

It needs his sharp eye

And we need a break

From never-ending idiocy

We need a President

With an appreciation for reality

One who doesn’t lie

From morning to night

Who doesn’t act as if

Everything is alright

I, ME, MINE

In Senator Tim Kaine’s words

The National Emergency is focused on

I, Me, Mine

They are the things

Really on his mind

He makes a pretense

Of interest in other stuff

But it’s only a pretense

He can’t get enough of himself

THE OBAMA ECONOMY

The economy’s going great

Thanks to Obama

He laid the groundwork

For an economic phenomena

But the National Emergency

Wants to take credit

Saying it was all himself

When all he added was rhetoric

And lots of it

The Orange One never shuts up

Continuously spouting nonsense

Which the media laps up like a pup

WELCOME TO THE FRAY, JOE

The National Emergency

Is welcoming “Sleepy Joe”

To the 2020 election

Which promises to be quite a show

The basic question is

Will the Democrats avoid

Selecting a candidate

Who is fatally flawed

Some Democrat hopefuls

Are so far to the left

Their few followers

Could fit in a possum’s nest

Don’t shoot ourselves in the foot

Should be the Democrats’ call

Keep eyes on the prize

And we’ll be at the inaugural ball

A GOOD POLITICIAN

A good politician

Can generally get along

With those he or she believes

Holds opinions that are wrong

Compromise is desirable

And is actually necessary

For successful government

In a democracy

The National Emergency

Judged by these criteria

Is headed for history’s dustbin

As a political failure

JARED SPOUTS OFF

Jared K says

A few Russian ads

Weren’t so bad

Compared to what Mueller did

To his by-marriage Dad

Hey Jared

Put a sock in it

Your head

Is really pretty thick

Meanwhile the National Emergency

Has his Administration

Resisting all Congressional attempts

At an investigation

Congressional subpoenas are likely

To be coming ‘round the bend

And a Congressional-Presidential struggle

Could create quite an historical din

“NOBODY DISOBEYS MY ORDERS!”

The National Emergency claimed

Nobody disobeyed his order

But that’s not what

Many told Bob Mueller

And they were under oath

Which the National Emergency doesn’t do

A wise move on his part

Since truth to him would be new

ABOUT FACE

After first praising it

The National Emergency

Has become enraged

By the Mueller treatise

He finds the language

Offensive and demeaning

Making it seem like

He deserves a reaming

He’s gotten all emotional

Lashing out left and right

Whining about

Every perceived slight

A CIRCULAR ACTIVITY

With a retweet about an activity

Likely unknown to his sister

The National Emergency

Is busy honoring Easter

The activity involves a circle

And some form of jerking

Perhaps the National Emergency

Will demonstrate while we’re observing

On second thought, however

Those days are probably behind him

His memories of how to proceed

Are undoubtedly pretty dim

BOTTOM LINE II

Another bottom line

From the Mueller Report

The National Emergency’s White House

Ain’t like a vacation resort

As a “manager”

The guy is a failure

Treating a subordinate

Like a rotten tomato

What sort of person

Willingly works for such a guy?

Probably the kind

Who likes defecation pie

And the National Emergency’s lying

Has no vaccine or antidote

Even Sweet Huckabee Sanders

Came down with a bout

MUELLER REPORT BOTTOM LINE

Although Russia interfered in the 2016 election

The National Emergency was not a Russian agent

Just a pathetic incompetent imperfection

Democrats would be wise

To avoid conspiracy theories

About the National Emergency’s collusion

With his Russian peers

What the National Emergency

Is indeed guilty of

Is overwrought language

Poor choice of staff

Lack of basic judgement

And being a pompous ass

Collusion requires a modicum of intelligence

Which the National Emergency lacks

His life is a continuous refusal

To acknowledge generally accepted facts

THE BIG DAY!

The big day has arrived

Barr’s version of the Mueller beehive

Is about to be released

News media and politicians

Are gritting their teeth

What will be true

And what will be fiction?

Agreement on these categories

Will be lost in adversarial diction

One thing is certain

The National Emergency will claim victory

And continue his assault

On our democracy

SECOND FIDDLE TO A FIRE

Is the National Emergency okay?

He wasn’t in the news much today

The fire at Notre Dame

Stole his thunder for a time

He did give some advice

Suggesting water bombing from the air

It was pointed out that this would

Destroy much beyond repair

On another topic he said

Boeing should rebrand its planes

Here’s a different idea

Why not just fix the damn things?

GOVERNMENT BY TEMPS

Call the temp agency

I need a SecDef

But only for a few weeks

Don’t want him or her to catch a breath

Thus the National Emergency

Staffs his Government

Nothing or no one permanent

Just temps struggling for momentary fulfillment

Have someone in a job too long

And they feel like they belong

They get comfortable questioning his authority

They begin to realize he’s a ding dong

REDACTION WEEKEND

AG Barr is spending the weekend

Redacting his ample butt off

Crossing out things left and right

Wanting to protect the boss

At least that’s how Democrats are viewing

The paperwork contortions

They don’t trust Barr to fairly present

Mueller’s damning conclusions

Republicans on the other hand

See redactions as important

They protect privacy

And might forestall impeachment

SANCTUARY CITIES

The National Emergency wants to send

Migrants seeking asylum

To sanctuary cities

Making it their problem

Why not bus the migrants

To Mar-a-Lago

Where they can cut grass, wash dishes

And entertain the nation’s orange honcho?

They could also help find

All those expensive golf balls

That he hits into the bushes

Or bounces off the walls

And when it is time

For them to get a green card

The honcho could preside

From his pristine tropical yard

WIKILEAKS

Wikileaks? Know nothing about it

Proclaimed the National Emergency

Is it some sort of gadget

To help you watch TV?

No way, Your Autocratness

It’s why you’re the President

No longer just a two-bit actor

Now a White House resident

Remember how your buddy Putin

Went to Wikileaks

With Hillary’s stolen emails

And you cheered and cheered for weeks?

AG BARR

Attorney General Barr

Is quite a character

He claims to be a lawyer

But there's some doubt about the matter

What lawyer would conclude

There are spies in the FBI

Checking out the National Emergency

As a political bad guy

Reasons for checking the National Emergency

Are his relations with Putin

Is Orange Head one of us

Or is he with Russia colludin'?

That’s not FBI spying

That’s FBI law enforcement

That’s what they’re paid to do

That’s why they’re part of the government

UNDER AUDIT

The National Emergency claims

He’s under IRS audit

We don’t know for sure

But many of us have bought it

Besides, he’s an honest fella

So how could we doubt him?

If he says it’s so

That should be enough to believe him

Bottom line is

The National Emergence’s tax returns

Are likely to remain unknown

Until well after his departure

From the nation’s throne

YOU'RE FIRED

The National Emergency is missing

His TV show The Apprentice

He got to act like a jerk

And pretend to be a menace

Well now he is a menace

A menace to law and order

To international stability

To a safe and secure border

The Constitution apparently

Means very little to him

Just a bunch of words

That interfere with government by whim

His solution to policy disputes

Is to fire a bunch of people

It worked on The Apprentice

And it got him to the national pinnacle

MANAGEMENT BY DESTRUCTION

The National Emergency is turning

The reins of government over

To weird looking Stephen Miller

Who’s purging left, right, and center

The Department of Homeland Security

Is bearing the brunt

Of the attempt by Miller and the Orange One

To deconstruct our government

Solving complex problems

Is not the National Emergency’s talent

He’s better at selecting

Dressing for his salad

The contradictory often illegal

Orders he gives his staff

Suggests that us citizens

Should be looking for a life raft

SO BEGINS ANOTHER WEEK

The National Emergency needs

A new Homeland Security Director

Kirstjen Nielsen is out

Probably had enough of the bumbling dictator

Meanwhile the National Emergency claims

He’s under IRS audit

So he can’t show his taxes

Even if he wanted

Thus begins another week

Of the Presidential soap opera

Next on the agenda

Likely another Presidential whopper

Maybe about windmill cancer

Or the greatness of Fox news

Or Federal Reserve missteps

Or maybe just the size of his shoes

WINGING IT

The National Emergency

Is doing what he enjoys

Holding rallies and spouting nonsense

Words are his toys

He’s like a kid with Legos

Who doesn’t like direction

Just slamming stuff together

Hoping for divine intervention

  

It worked in the business world

Where he bullied his way through

Not acknowledging error

Just demanding what he considered his do

Show no weakness

No evidence of remorse

Just act like

He’s never lost

"OUR COUNTRY IS FULL"

The National Emergency

Went to California

To brag a bit

And inspect his border

He neglected to mention

That Barack Obama

Had approved the section of wall

He asked the nation to ponder

“Our country is full”

Is what he proclaimed

And he wanted the Democrats

To take the blame

Well, he’s right

Our country is full

But of a bloviating buffoon

Who is full of bull

OLDEST FIRST-TERM PRESIDENT

The oldest first-term President

Is certainly showing his age

Physically he may be OK

But mentally he’s on the edge

He’s the rich grumpy gregarious grandpa

Come to holiday dinner

Spends his time trying

To convince you he’s a winner

Facts are not his strong suit

Indeed he finds them a nuisance

But feeling compelled to challenge his many fictions

For captive listeners is certainly an annoyance

AMERICA, WE MAY HAVE A PROBLEM

The National Emergency

Is in danger of becoming

A national emergency

His sentences meander

His coherence is deteriorating

“Origins” have become “oranges”

His falsehoods are proliferating

His Bronx-born father

Was born in Germany

His healthcare plan

Is pretty much imaginary

At 70-plus years

Maybe the onset of senility?

BACKING DOWN, TRUMP STYLE

How does the National Emergency back down?

First make a bellicose uproar

Then tuck his tail between his legs

And slink out the door

The National Emergency’s latest foray

Into the healthcare morass

Ended up with him looking

Like he just passed gas

He says action

Should be a no-go

‘Til after the 2020 election

So Trumpcare’s now in limbo

Maybe it’s the fault

Of tea party alum Mick Mulvaney

Who for the moment is the primary provider

Of the National Emergency’s intellectual gravy

MEXICO GETTING ON ORANGE ONE’S NERVES

The Mexican border problem

Has gotten in the National Emergency’s craw

He wants a solution

Maybe by appointing a czar

Closing the border

Appeals to the National Emergency

It’s an absolute step

Though rational minds are wary

Will the populace revolt

If there are no more avocadoes?

If Negra Modelo runs out?

If there is a shortage of tacos?