JOE AND THE PROGRESSIVES

 

Joltin’ Joe Manchin
And the Progressive Democrats
Are in a slow dance
Trying to avoid the other’s traps
 
Joe doesn’t want
To spend money
The Progressives think money flows
Like a river of honey

MASKS, FLASKS WHAT’S THE DIFF?

 

Masks provide no protection
So say many
Even the CEO of Southwest Airlines
Dissed them plenty
 
Maybe instead of a mask
We should wear a hazmat suit
And limit our social activities
To quietly playing a flute
 
Pardon the loopy goofiness
Cranky is flying today
His mind is pretty warped
By the covid at play

THEN AND NOW

 

The 1960s had left-wing whackos
Who were certainly strange
But they had mores and values
And sought much constructive change
 
The 2020s have right-wing nut jobs
Who are also strange
But they lack mores and values
And seek anti-democratic change

COVID WON’T STOP

 

Covid is exploding
Again
Just in time for the holidays
Tell the unvaxxed
They’re not outta the woods
They still could get waxed

LOSS OF MORALITY

 

How did the Republican Party
Lose its morality?
More broadly,
Why did many Americans follow
The Party’s falling trajectory?
 
The Hoax was not the cause
He was just a functionary
What was the fundamental flaw
In society and the citizenry?

DON’T TREAD ON ME

 

Don’t tread on me
Don’t jab my arm
I’m a free American
Covid can’t do me harm
 
The downside is
I ain’t very bright
Sometimes I make decisions
That just ain’t right

KEYSTONE COPS PRESIDENCY

 

The Mark Meadows kerfuffle
Is revealing the true nature
Of the Hoax’s presidency
It wasn’t a cabal of capable crooks
It was the Keystone Cops in residency

PROTECT PRO TRUMP PEOPLE

 

“Protect pro Trump people”
Is what Mark the Shark Meadows
Said the National Guard on Jan 6
Was prepared to do if danger arose
 
According to Mark’s inventory
Of interesting text messages
John Jr, Laura Ingraham, and Sean Hannity
Were among those pleading with Mark
To get the Hoax to stop the damages
 
Mark can’t decide
If he should talk or not
He mostly doesn’t want the Hoax
To let him rot

CHRIS WALLACE DEPARTS

 

Chris Wallace is moving on
Fox News won’t be the same
But it still has Tucker Carlson
At the top of his polarizing game

PTSD AT FOX

 

Fox News folks need help

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
Has obviously set in
They can’t stop with war stories
Nor the conservatives-as-victim spin
About the reduction of their Christmas tree
To a charred tenpin
 
Tucker especially
Is taking the thing personally
Viewing it as
A crime of great enormity
Warranting jail time
Maybe for eternity

WHAT IS WRONG WITH US?

 

How did one wannabe autocrat
Capture the unquestioning loyalty
Of so many in the county?
What flaw did he discern
In the citizenry?
 
Is the lowest common denominator
So large as to enable
An obviously unqualified rogue
To hijack the head of the table?

PERFORMANCE ARTISTS

 

Performance artists have become
The face of the Republican Party
Individuals craving attention
Not much interested in boring ol’ policy
 
Send out Christmas cards
With guns prominently displayed
Produce weird cartoonish videos
With opponents threateningly portrayed

WAR ON CHRISTMAS

 

A suspect has been charged
With setting afire Fox’s Christmas tree
But might others be involved?
Possibly a disgruntled former employee?
Fella with an Irish name maybe?

DEVIN TO THE RESCUE

 

Wow, what an eye for talent!
The Odious Orange Combover
Has selected a Congressman of great renown
Californian Devin Nunes
To get Combover’s nascent media empire
Off the ground
 
Maybe Tucker Carlson
Will be abandoning his Fox spot
To join the Combover and Nunes
In a milk-gullible-Republicans foxtrot

BUMPS IN THE ROAD

 

The foreign scene is
Beginning to heat up
Russia is eyeing Ukraine
China’s Winter Olympics may see
A diplomatic dustup
 
Meanwhile, covid is not
About to fade away
Indeed, it seems poised
For another big day
 
Congressman Jim Jordan says
For “real” America covid is done
He’s only partly right
In real blue America
Covid is heading down
In real red America
Covid is still going to town

MERRY BLUEGRASS CHRISTMAS

 

A Republican Kentucky Congressman
Tweeted a Christmas picture
His family was outfitted with guns
Guess that’s Bluegrass culture

BORING?

 

Is it possible to miss
The Odious Orange Outrage?
Politics is becoming boring
Maybe we need him on the stage

MAKE FLORIDA A NATION

 

Governor Ron DeSantis
Wants a state militia
Let’s do him one better
And send Florida on a great adventure
 
Subtract it from the union
Make it a separate nation
For too long it’s been an embarrassment
And a financial frustration

ALMOST OUTTA MONEY

 

Down to the wire
That’s how Congress works
Some might say
That makes them jerks
 
But give’m a break
Legislating is difficult
Getting something passed
Requires more than dumb luck
 
Speaking of dumb luck
Boebert, Jordan, McCarthy
Gosar, Gaetz, Greene
Cruz, Johnson, Hawley
All part of the Congressional machine

CAT FIGHT

 

C’mon Guys, gotta admit it
Watching Republican babes
Dukin’ it out
Is almost as much fun
As drinking strong stout
Or fishing for trout
 
A good old-fashion cat fight
And caught in the middle
Is Kevin Dork McCarthy
Perplexed by the muddle
Afraid to even wiggle