HE'S GOT REGRETS!!

Stop the Presses! The Donald's got regrets! After more than a year of no regrets, no apologizing, The Donald admitted in a speech on Thursday, August 18, in the year of Our Lord 2016, that he has regrets!

The pundits, commentators, and bovinators have gone nuts. Everything is changed. The race is competitive again. Hillary's in trouble.

Analyzing what The Donald meant, what the ultimate reaction will be, will go on for days. Lucky us.

One issue already surfacing is that The Donald didn't actually apologize to anyone or for any particular incident. He only expressed general regret. Is this enough? Will the polls suddenly start going The Donald's way?

Stay tuned, Folks. This election ain't over yet! Let's say it one more time, slowly:

The...Donald...has...expressed...regrets. Hallelujah!